Meet Lish McBride’s Gnome Army (& Necromancer giveaway!)

September 24, 2012 2012, author interview, guest post, lish mcbride 72

If you’re a fan of  the hilarious urban fantasies Hold Me Closer, Necromancer and the recently released Necromancing the Stone, you know Sam LaCroix is experiencing some household pains as he adjusts to his inherited army of mischievous gnomes.  You’ve probably also noticed that author Lish McBride’s bio claims that she’s been quietly assembling her own gnome army for some time now.


We were mightily intrigued by this idea. As part of the official Necromancing the Stone Blog Tour, we challenged Lish to share photographic evidence of her minions, as well as some insights into their sneaky behavior.

~ Wendy

P.S. Lish has confirmed, by the way, that there WILL be a third Necromancer book! It is planned for release sometime after her next two books are out. Stay tuned for more news.


Lish McBride Guest Post
Gnomes.
They are a mysterious bunch. They might seem shy at first—standoffish, even—but once you gain their trust, you will discover that they are a loud, proud, and slightly insane, warrior race.
Today I will present you with some photos that I took at great personal risk. We will see gnomes in their natural habitat and perhaps we will learn a little about these strange and tiny creatures.
Here we see a gnome who has tamed the wild snail! Tally ho, my warrior friend, and good hunting! (You might note that the gnome appears to be hailing us. This is not a friendly gesture. The gnome is most likely distracting you while a second gnome steals your wallet and lights your pants’ cuff on fire.)

Gnomes are constantly honing their skills in order to become greater warriors. These gnomes are working on their rapelling techniques. Nothing is more terrifying than a gnome aerial assault. No doubt they are chanting one of their favorite mottos, which is, “Death from above!”

This photo shows a clever decoy created by the gnomes themselves. Some scientists speculate that the gnomes use them for battle practice. Others postulate that they are for practical joke purposes. I think the gnomes use them for both. Underneath the gnome decoy, you will also see a white knitted kitten. That the gnomes created the kitten I believe shows that they are capable of whimsy.

This gnome is either back from battle, or just fell into a mud puddle. Either way I suggest that you do not approach.

Gnomes like to cash in on their adorable appearance. This particular gnome is taking it a step further and using a basket of flowers to disguise the haul of weapons that he is carrying.

Despite the traditional red hat and bright clothing, gnomes are quite adept at blending into their surroundings. I didn’t spot this little bugger until he bit my ankle.

Though not a lot is known about the gnome’s religious life, these statues are commonly erected for particularly respected warriors. Gnomes are known to leave offerings of jam, root beer, and Chuck Norris DVDs at the base of the statues out of respect.

After seeing the expression on this gnomes face, I quickly left the area. Moving on…

Unless you know the gnome well, never take anything it offers you. Gnomes are notorious practical jokers. When they aren’t trying to break your kneecaps, they’re filling your pants with itching powder. So while this gnome appears innocuous, it is best to err on the safe side.

And finally we see a gnome at rest. How peaceful he looks! (He also probably sleeps with a knife, as is their custom.)

Necromancing the Stone is available online and in stores now. Read our reviews of the books here and here
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About the Author

Lish McBride was raised by wolves in the Pacific Northwest. It rains a lot there, but she likes it anyway. She enjoys reading, movies, comics, and preparing herself for the inevitable zombie apocalypse. Currently, Lish lives happily in Seattle where the weather never actually tries to kill you, with her family, two cats, and one very put-upon Chihuahua. She is slowly building her garden gnome army.

Keep up with the latest news on Lish’s new books through her website, Twitter, blog, and GoodReads.

Win Both Necromancer Books

Our thanks to Lish McBride for sharing her gnome findings and for providing the photographs for this post!

Since our last giveaway for the sequel was so popular, we’re now giving away a prize pack that includes both the Hold Me Closer, Necromancer paperback as well as a Necromancing the Stone hardcover. This is the perfect opportunity to scoop up both books if you haven’t had a chance to try out the series yet!

Thanks to our friends at Henry Holt, this offer is open to U.S. and Canadian residents aged 18 and over. All you have to do is fill out the Rafflecopter form and tell us below what YOU would do with your own gnome army.

72 Responses to “Meet Lish McBride’s Gnome Army (& Necromancer giveaway!)”

  1. HKPerkinson

    I remember reading a big book about gnomes that was popular when I was in 5th grade–they were a real thing then. I would love to have an army of them to help out with the yard work. I would totally assign them the task of eradicating our Japanese beetle infestation.

  2. ZaraAlexis

    Ever since I watched “Gnomeo & Juliet,” my fears about gnomes went away. My gnome army would secretly protect my children!

  3. Lark

    Love the gnome photos, but Lish’s comments about them are even better. And you’ve got me curious; I’ll have to check out the series!

  4. molly.frenzel

    I don’t know what it is about gnomes, but they’ve always freaked me out. They’re always watching and happy. I dunno…makes my skin crawl.

  5. Yahong Chi

    My own personal gnome army would definitely take care of my plants for me. Though I’ve always loved the idea of having a garden, I seem to have no green thumb whatsoever… so I’d entrust the plants to my gnomes in the hopes that a few less deaths would occur under my (er, their) watch. :P

    And I adored Hold Me Closer, Necromancer — so glad to hear there’s a sequel!

  6. Yahong Chi

    My personal gnome army would definitely take care of my plants for me. I love the idea of having a garden… but I seem to have no green thumb whatsoever. So to spare all those poor plants from dying, I’d task my gnomes to look after them.

    And I adored Hold Me Closer, Necromancer — so glad to hear there’s a sequel!

  7. elena

    Hee! This is such a fun post, I never really put much thought into gnomes but an army of them does seem quite handy. I read the first book and enjoyed it well enough so I’m curious about the next. Not entering the giveaway btw, just going to wait to see if my library gets it. :D

  8. Bboo04

    I like gnomes I think they are cute and funny. If I had my own gnome army I think I would probably have them clean the house for me. lol And this series sounds interesting so I would like to read it.

  9. Heidi@Rainy Day Ramblings

    Well who knew that gnomes liked Chuck Norris and beer. ThatbTravelocity
    gnome has got nothing over these adventurous gnomes. I am moving this series up because hey gnomes are different as long as they don’t jump out from under the bed and bite my ankle and two Lish is a fellow NW neighbor. So that makes her a-okay in my book!

  10. Rachel

    Eeeek! I would never want a gnome army! Those things creep me the heck out!! This post was beyond funny if not a little frightening. Another giveaway?! Wow and thanks! :)

    • Wendy Darling

      Hah, I don’t normally like to do so many giveaways so close together, but it’s really these publishers’ fault for putting out so many great books this fall! I REGRET NOTHING.

    • Wendy Darling

      Oh no! Maybe try entering again sometime, Andrea? The contest ends in just under two weeks. The entries have been a little slower than usual the past couple of days, though, I wonder if other people are having this problem, too.

  11. Oh! Paper Pages

    I received a copy of Necromancing the Stone and have been meaning to read the first one. Gnomes are interesting creatures, and I began to adore them in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. I always wanted to degnome my garden. Having an army of gnomes is such an odd and exciting prospect. I really need to get on this series to fulfill such a fantasy.

    • Wendy Darling

      I imagine them beating their chests with their tiny fists. Funny and terrifying all at once!

      I’m so happy there will be a third book, too. Even if we do have to wait awhile.

  12. Sam

    I have to admit, I’ve never really given gnomes a second thought before. Cute as they look, I’m suddenly terrified of them. ;) Thanks for sharing this brilliant post! :)

    • Wendy Darling

      Awww! You’re not the only person who said that today. According to Lish, there seems to be good reason for your fears, though. I hope these photos didn’t freak you out too much.

  13. Carl

    I think they prefer to be outside so I’d set them to work dreaming up games to play with my dog. Nothing too exciting that would make him bark a lot. Just some basic hide and seek stuff to keep him exercised and alert.

  14. My anxious life

    I love the post about the gnomes which is why I stopped by to read this post! I recently made a terrarium with a little gnome in it!!! Love it!!!

    • Wendy Darling

      Aw, how cute! I have been meaning to make my own terrarium forever. (I used to craft a lot.) Putting a tiny gnome in one sounds just darling.

  15. M.A.D.

    These gnomes are so cute!! If I had an army of them I would do like one creative youtube fellow did and pass them out to unsuspecting workers at fast-food drive up windows ;D

    Mary DeBorde M.A.D.

  16. Amy

    This post is awesome!! If I had a gnome army I would use it to get rid of all the stray neighborhood cats. Seriously, they pee and defecate all over my lawn. These books sound really great. I have been wanting to read them.

    • Wendy Darling

      Well…I don’t want to spoil anything, but I seem to recall the gnomes in the second book doing some pretty naughty things on Sam LaCroix’s lawn, too. Ahem.

  17. Steph

    I don’t know what I would do with my gnome army – but I like the idea of using them to do my household chores so I could do other (more fun) things. I haven’t read either of these books yet, but they’ve been on my wishlist forever! Thanks for the awesome giveaway!

    • Wendy Darling

      Household chore work seems to be a popular pick for this game, hah. You really must check out this series soon, though–they are SO much fun. :)

  18. ahz1

    I think I’d use my gnome army to scare away the pesky squirrels that keep digging up my garden.

  19. Busybeesfamily

    I’d use my gnome army to keep my wayward and precocious preschooler in line. No more telling me what she’s too big for anymore (or still too little for, if the situation warrants)! No more arguing over the dinner table. No more arguing at bathtime. And for the love of all that’s holy . . . no more arguing at bedtime!!!

  20. Busybeesfamily

    I’d use my gnome army to keep my wayward and precocious preschooler in line. No more telling me what she’s too big for anymore (or still too little for, if the situation warrants)! No more arguing over the dinner table. No more arguing at bathtime. And for the love of all that’s holy . . . no more arguing at bedtime!!!

    • Wendy Darling

      I can imagine a Lilliputian scenario with your toddler and a small group of gnomes, hah. Poor little tyke! But I bet it’s the safest and most efficient form of babysitting.

  21. Christina Fiorelli

    Christina K. in the rafflecopter

    I’d totally use them to get revenge on anyone who bugs me:) They’re small, can pretend to be lawn ornaments and then sneak inside when someone unlocks a door:)

  22. erin

    Thanks for a great post and giveaway! How have I missed this series! This sounds awesome! I would love an army of gnomes… especially if they do house and yard work :)

    • Wendy Darling

      It’s such a great series, Erin! And yeah, an army of gnomes would definitely come in handy. For so many different purposes. *daydreams*

  23. Bonnie R

    haha! I love this guest post.
    “Gnomes like to cash in on their adorable appearance. This particular gnome is taking it a step further and using a basket of flowers to disguise the haul of weapons that he is carrying.”
    I’ve always found gnomes to be a bit freaky…so I completely agree with the above statement.
    HMCN was awesome so I can’t wait to get my hands on this one!

  24. Tammy Sparks

    A gnome army scares me a bit, I don’t think I’d know what to do with one! But I am dying to read these books, since I’ve heard such good thing about them. Thanks for the giveaway!

  25. Nicole T

    Ever since I was little, things like gnomes and dolls always scared me :( so I’m sorry to say that gnomes kind of creep me out.. I don’t know why! But there are tons of possibilities with a gnome army! But I loved Hold Me Closer, Necromancer. It’s one of my favourite books, and I’ve been waiting for months for Necromancing the Stone! So excited, I would love to get a copy of it! :)

    • Wendy Darling

      A lot of dolls still scare me, too! They’re tiny, blank-faced…people. I’ve never heard of a gnome fear, but judging by some of the comments here, you’re not alone in that, Nicole. At least you have more insight into their behavior now. ;)

  26. Karen

    I have never been a fan of Gnomes but this post cracked me up.

    I kind of like that they’re not innocuous. lol

  27. Eunice

    Wow! Thanks for the awesome insights about gnomes , Lish! They do look cute but yeah, after reading your post I know they are far from cute now. I’m sure to be cautious and careful around them. Haha!

    Great post, Wendy! Can’t join the giveaway though. Uggh, I hope I live in US! Haha! :D

    • Wendy Darling

      I think it’s always best to tread with caution around tiny magical things, hah.

      Most of our giveaways are international, but this one is being shipped directly from the publisher so we had to limit it, I’m afraid! Hope you can get ahold of the book soon.

  28. Kaethe

    Since I’m not very aggressive, I’d probably just use my gnome army to do all the chores I’d rather pass on, giving me more reading time. Of course, slavery is wrong, so they would in turn rebel and murder me, unless my cats manged to defeat them.

    Probably I’m better off just ignoring the chores. I dearly loved Hold me Closer, so I’m really looking forward to this one. And I’m very excited to hear a third is planned. AS well as other books.

    • Wendy Darling

      Hah hah, cats vs. gnomes would be a sight to behold indeed. I was excited to hear confirmation of the third book in this series (and more), too! I tried to get Lish to dish on what all these entailed, but she wouldn’t budge. ;)

  29. Vivien

    My gnome army would be constantly in the kitchen cooking me food….nom nom nom

    But really, I’m definitely eager to read this sequel. You guys have me hooked on this series with your excellent reviews.